April is here with a new header!

On this day 30 years ago, the Internet as we recognize it got rolling with the implementation of the World Wide Web. Today it’s rather ubiquitous and only elderly people bother to put the three Ws or ‘http://’ in front a site. It’s not necessary because browsers and the Internet’s infrastructure knows where you want to go.

I remember pretty well what I was doing. I was enjoying my junior year at Marquette with a cool internship at WQFM, basking in Milwaukee’s improving weather and generally being unimpressed with what computers did beyond TRON and Ultima. I guess I got on the winning team in time to have a viable career.

Posted in Apple, News, Science & Technology, The Site | Tagged , | Leave a comment

The UK and its inept gov’t get an extension

In short, the people of the UK are so screwed. If they think their has-been empire will rebound from all they’re going to lose trading with the rest of Europe, they’re also delusional. According to On the Media, some of the UK’s non-White citizens voted to leave because they were upset over other Europeans having freedom of movement while they couldn’t bring in their relatives as easily. Nice to know that White people don’t have a monopoly on stupidity and nationalism.

The people of England will have nobody to blame but themselves. Something as complicated as the ramifications over leaving/remaining were best left to Parliament. You know, why people elect officials democratically to handle such issues. Instead, Cameron foolishly put this to a plebiscite with a simple binary vote which the Russians probably helped tip in favor of assholes Nigel Farage and Boris Johnson.

This reminds of why Texas needs to ban constant amendments to the state constitution by similar trickery. We all know what the Republicans in the statehouse want but they don’t have the balls to vote on. So they leave it up to the electorate while smothering the ballot in  confusing Orwellian doublespeak. The majority often vote in favor of what ALEC, the Koch Brothers and other right-wing stink tanks wanted all along. It’s win win for the Republicans too. They get the changes they wouldn’t stick their neck out for and can blame the people for being gullible.

Posted in News | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Math-Nerd Onesies

My friends Elizabeth and Matthew received or bought (not sure which) a couple Math-based joke onesies for their new son Aaron. That’s the beauty of being an infant, you don’t have to worry about bullies and morons not getting the jokes as my Lenin-Socialist joke shirt puzzled a casino worker in Vegas. Good thing that guy was in the latter camp, I can’t fight anymore.

I like these though. They make sense and unlike the ones I have bought from T-Shirt Hell, Aaron can wear these in public.

Posted in Funny Ones, Math, Science & Technology, Shirts | Tagged | Leave a comment

1979: The Three Mile Island Disaster

For better or for worse, the accident that happened at this American nuclear power plant changed the country’s opinion about how safe this type of energy generation was. Thanks to TMI (before it became the abbreviation for Too Much Information), the US hasn’t ordered a new nuclear power plant in 40 years. What probably helped was a little movie released around the same time called The China Syndrome. The film’s disaster scenario was nothing compared to what could’ve happened in real life but you could count on the ways a corporation would lie in both realms.

Personally, I’m glad the majority of Americans have sided against nuclear energy. Chernobyl and Fukushima have continued to drive the point home in how dangerous fission really is. Apologists such as a former friend would point toward Soviet neglect and the Japanese having bad luck by showing how much success the French have. I wouldn’t exactly hold up the French as paragons given the more recent cracks in their society bubbling up via the Yellow Vest movement, a dispshit president and how all their tax cheats suddenly have hundreds of millions of Euros to rebuild Notre Dame. The biggest problem is radioactive waste and when you live in a crippled democracy/bustling oligarchy, NIMBY (Not In My Backyard) remains a powerful force in resolving something you can’t get rid of for centuries.

The economic argument has continually proven to be bullshit too. Not one nuclear power plant has been completed on scheduled nor on budget so how much each megawatt of electricity produced costs borders on ridiculous. Burning hundred-dollar bills to run a turbine would be cheaper. Even China has lost its taste for this despite bringing a fourth-generation plant online.

Critics may mock wind and solar power but they seem rather speechless when you point out their lack of radioactive fallout. Back when I was a precinct delegate in 2008, I argued against any pro-nuclear power language by letting everyone know that their homeowner’s insurance has a loophole not covering fallout. If greedy insurance companies won’t protect you against something with “impossible” odds, is it truly safe? Not a chance in hell.

Posted in History, Physics, Science & Technology | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Elaborate Health Assessment 2019

This ordeal, and I will call it that, was way more work for me than any physical exam. It involved me doing a stair-stepper thing for three minutes (good thing I exercise, I would’ve dropped dead sooner), a plank (I thought a minute and five seconds was good, it wasn’t even close) and push-ups (HA! zero). Of course the obvious stuff, blood drawing, reflexes, breathing for a stethoscope and proving I can do basic functions. I have dodged the bogeyman of Type Two Diabetes easily! If 23 and Me is to be believed, my DNA has an advantage against the general public. The big test I wanted to take was the bod pod. Besides looking like Mork from Ork’s egg-shaped spaceship, it can measure your body-fat percentage with bursts of air instead of the old way using submersion. I guessed I would be half fat. Nope, I’m luckily 41.3% fat. Here’s the downside of my exercising and weight loss. I must introduce more strength training into the daily routine, otherwise, as I shed the pounds (over 10 in a year, I have a steady plan), the percentage will remain the same which is bad. It means as the fat goes away, so do the muscles, bones and things I want to have around as I age.

Still, it could’ve been worse, as in I had this done last year, blech!

I get to revisit this in about six months, see how much I have progressed. Lifting weights? Boring, but I’ll figure something out.

Posted in Health, News | Tagged | Leave a comment

RIP: Ranking Roger (nee Roger Charley) with anecdote

Such a shame to lose Roger at such an early age. Many of you all, especially if you’re under 40, probably don’t recognize his name but he was a major player in early Eighties music under the New Wave banner and MTV’s formative years. However, mostly everybody has heard of the bands he was in: The English Beat and General Public, with their hits “Mirror in the Bathroom,” “Save it for Later,” and “Tenderness.” There’s more yet I just went with what lazy radio stations stick with.

After two albums with Dave Wakeling as General Public, Roger went solo around 1988. Here’s when he came into my personal life alongside my university friend Helen, who I hope will comment.

During the Summer of 1988, I would spend a big chunk of my spare time hanging out at my alma mater‘s radio station (WMUR 750 AM). It was a hotter than usual Summer in Milwaukee so I took advantage of the building’s AC while taking care of the place’s affairs: making sure the engineer wasn’t stealing our records, communicating with the labels, turning in playlists for our part-time operations and having fun. This really nice lady with Sire Records I had been corresponding with gave me a call around August. She got me on the guest list to see Ranking Roger because her company’s act, Chiefs of Relief was the opener. All I had to do was haul ass to Chicago’s Cabaret Metro (near Wrigley Field and today it’s just Metro) to attend. By then I had enough money to get by until school started and had quit paint crew.

Since the guest was me plus one, I immediately twisted Helen’s arm into going. I don’t think it was difficult. She really liked the Chiefs of Relief songs we played on WMUR and knew who Ranking Roger was.

Off we went to the bus station for neither of us had a car. In Milwaukee, Marquette was downtown, access to Greyhound was easy. Chicago was a tad trickier. There we’d transfer from O’Hare to the subway/train to where Cabaret Metro was. We arrived while it was light, saw Wrigley Field nearby and left a message for our mutual friend (Helen’s future husband) Paul to let him know we were in the vicinity to say howdy.

As for the show, it was pretty cool. Chiefs of Relief didn’t receive much of a reaction from the tiny crowd despite the drummer being Paul Cook (Sex Pistols) or singer/guitarist Matthew Ashman (Bow Wow Wow, Adam & the Ants). I went out to the lobby when CoR finished their set to see how/when to get my interview with the band, record a station ID, portable cassette recorder in hand (oh the Eighties!). While waiting I ran into Richard Gotterher, CoR’s producer while my brain had completely locked up, failing to remember even then he was a legend as per the link; he also produced other records I loved by Blondie, the Go Go’s, the J. Geils Band and Mental as Anything (he would work with the JudyBats in the future). Richard was in Chicago to see how CoR was faring at the tour’s launch. Not well sadly. Then I met CoR’s tour manager, he had just finished handling Underworld through the US and I could tell by the look on his face, this wasn’t going to be easy given CoR’s foul mood from the poor reception.

The station ID and quick interview with Ranking Roger fell through thanks to me running out of time and Helen and me having to turn down Matthew Ashman’s offer to travel with his band given he had seen our enthusiasm in the crowd. It was pretty tempting. They would wrap up in Washington DC and maybe Helen’s mom would cover our return trip to Milwaukee. Even in my foolish youth, I quick declined. I didn’t feel like sleeping on the floor of hotel rooms over the next couple weeks.

Our adventure continued when the concert ended…unfortunately.

We tried really hard to catch the subway back to O’Hare in order to snag the last Greyhound to Milwaukee. We weren’t even close. This meant we had to spend the entire night in the airport, staying awake out of fear and the terminal’s seats being designed to prevent any comfortable loitering. Being 19-20, we figured, how hard could it be? We’ve crammed for exams or written papers under similar conditions. HA! It was hard and this poor, probably insane Asian guy having a helluva’ conversation with imaginary people put Helen in a minor panic. I was also surprised how dead O’Hare was. I guess the international terminal is where the action never stops.

When the time for the first Greyhound to Milwaukee was due to arrive, Helen and I rushed   down to the bus stop. This would’ve been around 6 AM. We were exhausted, clinging on to what little energy we had remaining (I never drank coffee then) from being awake past midnight and excited about the nap we’d get on the 90-minute trip back.

The bus flew right by.

Livid, we managed to hang in there until Trailways appeared over an hour later. Thankfully they took checks, we had no cash remaining. I know I passed out before we were officially on I-94 and had enough energy to walk the mile to the apartment I was subleasing to finish sleeping. Greyhound refunded the full price of our round-trip tickets which was nice, I only wanted the unused part.

Helen and I continue to reminisce about our silly Chicago adventure and we thank Ranking Roger for making it possible.

Thank you for all the great music Roger! You will be missed because you had a huge impact on how the Eighties shaped up and future Ska-related acts: early No Doubt, Mighty Mighty Bosstones and I can some influences in personal faves, Bowling For Soup and the Aquabats.

Posted in Music | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Making cookies with Cookie Monster

A while back I started subscribing to comic book author and Saturday-morning cartoon show runner Mark Evanier. I know him best as Sergio Aragones’ writing partner on Groo the Wanderer. One thing Mark likes to do is share videos he finds or people introduce him to. This cookie-making movie was made several years ago but it’s very entertaining. The person puppeteering Cookie Monster is fantastic in their ad libbing and reacting to the host. I do agree with Mark on a major point, this lady is so perky, she might be a Muppet herself. It’s entertaining. Check it out.

Posted in Diversions | Tagged | Leave a comment

Sherwood Forest Faire ’19

We had such a great time last year, we managed to come back sooner. Well, Sherwood is easier to take in than the Renaissance Faire which takes place in the “Fall.” I put quotes around the season because it’s still hotter than blazes around Central Texas when the latter is happening. Another advantage Sherwood has is being near Bastrop, a much shorter drive than the other’s being closer to College Station, or is it Houston.

Thanks to a tip from my work’s D&D club, I found out Sherwood has a BOGO deal on admission if you arrive before noon on Sundays. Worked out well for us, Somara only has Sunday and Monday off with her schedule. We arrived late but the organizers extended the discount due to computer issues. Maybe they heard about the accident blocking traffic on the way in too. Very nice of them. I made sure I spent something extra to compensate.

This lady had an awesome outfit! She was cool with me making an NPC of her in my campaign. She joins the legions of others I’ve been inspired by over the years.

I went a bit crazy on the shopping this year too. I scored some pins for us with silly things on them, obviously more of those cool coins to use in my game (need to find last year’s stash!), a spiffy wizard hat (allegedly it’s a Harry Potter design) and I broke down, bought a well-made cloak. The original one I wanted was about $400. Hear me out. It had incredible embroidery and a fantastic clasp. Somara compromised by letting me buy a cheaper cloak (closer to $100) but I need to have it water-proofed from rain. Will I wear it in public? Probably not.I enjoy these fairs very much. My parents would never take me, I think they feared being exposed by bigger nerds than their son and/or it I would become even “worse” in their mainstream eyes.

We didn’t stay as long as we did last year. The weather began to get too warm for my comfort level plus I was tired from hitting the gym in the morning, walking around may get me more points on the Watch, yet fatigue happens. It was a great time, no doubt. Next time I will remember to bring cash to tip the performers when we watch them and maybe I will take a shot at knife throwing. I definitely will hit the petting zoo! Goats smell but they’re so damned cute when they’re kids.

Posted in D & D | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Gauntlet joke

A pretty good amateur gag covering how food works in the old video game Gauntlet. The bit showing Questor the Elf doing what often happened when you were in a multiplayer game is relatable because there’s always one idiot out ruin the fun.

Posted in Arcade Games, Console, D & D | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

RIP Larry Cohen

Another great B-Movie director/writer/creator has passed away. Larry may not be as famous as Roger Corman or Russ Meyer but he gave us some pretty bitchin’ flicks through his career: Black Caesar, It’s Alive, Q and The Stuff. With Joe Bob Briggs’ return via Shudder, there was a tribute to Larry because these movies were Drive-In staples when I was growing up. I remember this older kid in my neighborhood during the late Seventies who got to see It’s Alive and he gave us a good synopsis. It was the days before HBO so talking to a kid with “bad” parents was the only to get the skinny.

Now I need to catch the recent documentary Cohen on Cohen which is about Larry since I discovered him way too late.

Posted in Movies | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

1919: Benito Mussolini founds the Fascist Party

A century ago, a horrendous political movement was created by Benito Mussolini. Although Hitler would take this crappy mindset even further, resulting in three percent of the planet being killed and practically all Jews in Europe exterminated, Mussolini came from a different background.

He was originally a from the Italian Left. His mother named him Benito after the famous Mexican present Benito Juarez, not a favorite amongst conservative Mexicans or European colonials, especially the French. Mussolini was also a member of the Italian Socialists and publisher of the newspaper Avanti (“forward”). Why he broke with them would require me to read a book (someday) but I’m guessing his experiences in WWI. Unlike the other victors in the Great War, Italy wasn’t in a much better shape than the defeated. This eventually led to him practically overthrowing the rightfully elected government in 1922 and declaring himself il Duce (“leader”) several years later.

We all know the rest of the story.

Another thing I want to bring up. There’s an apologist cliché you may occasionally hear, “at least Mussolini made the trains run on time.” No, he didn’t.

Today, it seems that the West, namely America, has forgotten how evil, immoral and terrible Fascism is. Compared to Hitler’s Nazis, Mussolini and Franco were amateurs yet racism, nationalism, sexism and violence are in the movement’s DNA. Trump is not really a Fascist though. He’s a demented, spoiled prick. More akin to an inbred European king of old utilizing dog-whistle tactics to rally the American Fascists and their ilk hiding in the woodwork. Both sides are using each other to further their agendas until they’re no longer useful. Thankfully Trump is old so he’ll be dead soon. What I’m now worried about is this anti-intellectual movement finding their new leader after Ill Douche.

Posted in History, Italians | Tagged , | Leave a comment

1988: The Naked Gun, still holds up

Another entry for the Lost Tales or “Steve didn’t post this in a timely fashion.” In the end, does anyone really care? Maybe. I really wanted to get my recollection posted closer to the New Year because that’s when I saw this originally in 1989, probably at a discount theater in San Diego while I was on vacation. I’m surprised my parents agreed to this, they weren’t very big fans of Airplane! but by then I was 20 so Mom couldn’t do anything if I saw bare boobs on the screen.

The Zucker-Abrams-Zucker team went back to their short-lived show on ABC, Police Squad which I remembered fondly as a kid. I didn’t get all the jokes ridiculing cop show tropes at 13 but it remained funny. Six years later, I had a better idea and even though ZAZ recycled some gags, Naked was a damn hilarious flick. Its jokes still hold up today despite the dated elements today’s younger audiences may not understand, a world before:

  • Ubiquitous cell phones
  • Easy Internet access
  • OJ Simpson being more famous for murdering his ex-wife

I had forgotten other sequences and one became my new favorite bit, the one involving Leslie Nielsen commandeering a student driver’s car with the student and teacher at the helm. Playing the teacher was John Houseman who by then was typecast as a stuffy, pompous, professor. I think he relished the opportunity to do something humorous with the persona he had cultivated all those years.

If you haven’t seen The Naked Gun in a while, set aside 90 minutes to revisit what gave Leslie Nielsen a third act to his career. Never seen it. Check it out, after you’ve watched two key movies leading to this: The Kentucky Fried Movie and of course, Airplane! Top Secret was released in 1984 and it’s equally great so you can choose before or after. The same goes for Hot Shots and the highly underrated Jane Austen’s Mafia.

Posted in Eighties Tutorial, Movies, Streaming, The Lost Tales | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Longest official streak ends at 52 days

I blame exhaustion caused by Daylight Savings Time for bringing my streak to an end. Better to take a sick day now before something much worse and more crippling happens.

However, I’m not bummed. I actually look forward to starting a new streak in which I may beat this and push out the record to 100+. Plus I’m still having a great year as I’m further along today than I ever was by the same date last year. At the rate I’m going, I might double the number of miles I achieve, that’s 2400 for anyone who cares.

Next week I will be going in for this more extensive physical. The staff will measure my body-fat ratio, I’m guessing it will be 50/50; how fit I am via a stair stepper thing, push-ups (HA!) and planking (another HA!); and the dreaded diabetes possibility. Oh yeah, cholesterol…but hamburgers are soooooooo good. Despite how much cardio I do, I figure I’m just a fat guy who can outrun the zombies a little longer than most survivors. Thus, when the shit goes down, the first place I’m looting is a sporting-goods store and anywhere selling katanas or swords.

Posted in Health, News | Tagged | Leave a comment

New D&D/PF campaign, but this time I’m a player!

One cool thing at my job, beyond the hundreds of people on site, are all the groups/clubs my employer encourages. Oddly, Austin never had a strong D&D group. I joined the e-mail group years ago but all the traffic was Cupertino-generated. Then someone finally spoke up about Austin being neglected, hence those photos of my sailing ship, the guy overseeing the whole operation was in the background.

To make a long, boring, story short, I belong to the subgroup of the subgroup, the Pathfinder people. I’m glad to see D&D being popular again yet I just don’t like Fifth Edition. It puts the game on a better track than the horrendous Fourth but Fifth would’ve been more appropriate if it came out after Second. Too much is gimped, multi classing is almost non-existent and monsters remain in restrictive silos. There were enough of us who wanted to pursue Pathfinder and someone stepped up to DM! I plan to be a monk as I’ve been enjoying all those Shaw Brothers’ flicks on Netflix.

What about my 2013-initiated campaign starring Seilu (Matthew), Opal (Elizabeth) and Hitana (Somara)? I want to get it back on track badly, I’ve invested pretty heavily in the story-arc involving the awesome city Korvosa. We need to wait for Aaron to get more manageable is my guess. Fear not. The Pfellowship of Pflugerville will return to vanquish various evils plaguing Golarion, just continuing it in First Edition Pathfinder.

Posted in D & D | Tagged | Leave a comment

Another year without a Shamrock Shake

I need to get off my butt and write a polite, complaint letter to the McDonald’s corporation regarding them letting this tradition lapse. Maybe it’s a Texas problem, I need input from all of you who live in other US regions, Canada too.

I know that in McDonald’s case, Shamrock Shakes are just vanilla with green food coloring yet they were a highlight of my childhood in the Seventies, especially during Lent. Washing down those disappointing Filet O’Fish sandwiches with the seasonal drink took the sting out of Friday being partially ruined by a dumb Catholic dietary restriction. Some sacrifice too. Anything seafood based usually costs more on most restaurant menus, including fish tacos.

I hope to dove tail my gripe with another trend I’ve heard on podcasts, namely Nerd Poker. Have you noticed that the shake equipment is often “broken” at many fast food places?

Posted in Diversions | Tagged , | Leave a comment