Kubo and the Two Strings: Must See

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Another diamond in the rough of crap this Summer. Then again I tend to have more faith in Laika studios like I used to for Pixar…until Laika decides to make Boxtrolls 2, thankfully they’re not taking the easy way.

Kubo is a made-up story and not part of any Japanese folklore yet you’d think it was given the details. It’s a tale about a little boy with one eye who must find three relics to keep his evil grandfather at bay. He is joined at the start of the quest by a snow monkey that talks and then a beetle-esque samurai warrior. Kubo isn’t completely helpless, he can make origami props when he plays his shamisen (three-stringed Japanese guitar/ukelele); e.g. wings to fly away, a ship, etc.

It may be a “kid” movie but there’s enough humor and story to keep adults entertained. I for one was pleased to hear a little more range from Matthew McConaughey as the beetle samurai.

Alamo Extras: Stop-motion fairytale thing; two guys playing “Billie Jean” on shamisens; a Japanese cartoon celebrating the Harvest Festival; kids playing instruments; someone demonstrating the four major styles of playing guitar; Star Wars anthem on a shamisen; tap dancing accompanied by a shamisen.

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Belated birthday to Steve (aka Stvee)!

I was pre-occupied with other crises on Friday but I think the card we sent arrived on time. This really hit the spot of what Stvee likes.

2016 is special too. We met 25 years ago at GenCon (when it was still in Milwaukee and not Indianoplace) and we hit it off quickly. I will always remember the primary reason, I politely had questions for Stvee on how he put Challenge magazine together. Most convention attendees torture artists about the game characters. Just as painful as being an editor and having people telling you why you suck and here’s their notebook full of peeves. You know, the Eltingville Crowd or jerks who make fandom awful for others.

Back to my friend. I hope he had a great day not matter what he did.

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Rick Sanchez has good advice

getschwiffty

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Rest in Peace John Martin

Last week John was killed in a car accident courtesy of an asshole running a red light up in Georgetown. I received the sad news during my lunch hour Friday from a co-worker.

Although John left Apple a few years ago, mainly due to his health concerns, he was a member of my 1998 contractor class. Back in those days to join Apple, you had to be skilled enough to support the field techs because there was no front line in Austin. John was pretty clever but his true talents were in software, namely multi-media and when Apple started selling Final Cut Pro he became a wizard.

John will be sorely missed.

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Farewell Gawker.com

The gossip site shuts down today since Univision had no interest in purchasing it alongside the sister sites. Meanwhile, piece-of-crap Hulk Hogan and enemy of democracy Peter Thiel are beside themselves with delight. Fear not, assholes like those two will get their comeuppance.

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Good luck Larry Wilmore

Friday night I watched the last episode of The Nightly Show courtesy of a DVR. I’m rather bummed over Comedy Central canceling the comedy/panel/talk show. Nightly may not have had the same voice as The Colbert Report or The Daily Show but Larry and his writers were trying something different…something the decrepit Sumner Redstone has no clue about doing.

CC’s current plan is to fill the time with At Midnight. There’s a surprise, I figured they would’ve fallen back on reruns of Scrubs or milk Futurama further.

Good luck Larry, I hope you land on your feet since you’re truly funny.

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Got to relive a little of the Summer of ’89

Saturday I got to dust off an old skill I gained in college…painting. No, not painting a picture or minis, painting walls and ceilings. During my Summers in Milwaukee, I spent three out of four were spent as a member of Marquette’s paint crew. The job entailed washing and painting the walls of dorm rooms. The middle year was my favorite because I was a cutter (translation, someone who trimmed the edges before the others with rollers do the rest). I was also proud of my brush by the time we were laid off; we got busted for playing Pictionary with the first coat of some super thin paint.

What does this have to do with Saturday? My friends needed some assistance painting their baby girl’s room. I decided “sure, painting is a zen thing.” My height helped too. I managed to paint the ceiling over a few hours without any major spills. Maybe I’ll have a photo of my handiwork down the road.

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RIP Jack Riley

Farewell to the man who was Bob Newhart’s grumpy patient Mr. Carlin  in the Seventies but to my generation and younger people he was the voice of Stu Pickles on Rugrats. Jack had a very distinct voice. I think he also did commercials for Comp USA in the Nineties.

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First-person view of a Hot Wheels ride!

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Springfield at night

Austin resident Tim Doyle has created a series of pictures showing what the iconic town may resemble when the sun goes down. Pretty interesting and clever since Springfield is an unsung cast member.

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From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series

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The Rodriguez-Tarantino team up from 20 years ago became a serialized TV show for Rodriguez’s cable channel El Rey. Recently the second season was posted on Netflix so I decided to check it out because I needed to trying something new, I was getting into the bad habit of re-watching Futurama and Bob’s Burgers and Star Trek: NG became a serious chore around the fourth season…I’ll get back to it, I promise.

The third season will kick off next month on El Rey. I have no idea how long it will take to appear on Netflix. Hopefully not so long that I will have to re-watch the 20 episodes to remember what the hell was going on.

I did complete the first season, a mere 10 episodes. Here the same plot from the movie is extended out to about 450 minutes. To fill the time we see more backstory on the Gecko Brothers and the fallen preacher with his two teens headed for Mexico. In addition there’s a Texas Ranger pursuing the Geckos who joins the story arc and we get to know the primary vampire running the hangout. I’m not spoiling this element I’m about to mention. Instead of the villains being just vampires, they’re really a snake-vampire hybrid called culebras. They remind me of the D&D monsters called yuan-ti. Culebras have vampire weaknesses: they burn in sunlight, they need to feed on blood, they regenerate, they’re killed with a direct piercing in the heart and they can convert victims into their kind. The latter has a condition, the target must receive the venom to turn into a culebra-vampire.

The plot is more elaborate than the movie too.

  • The Geckos have stolen $30 million in oil bonds and they’re going to exchange it with the infamous bar’s operator Carlos, not Mexican organized crime in the film. Carlos promises the Geckos they’ll never have to sweat American authorities ever again.
  • The Preacher is leaving for Mexico for more than a vacation. He’s trying to forget the death of his wife and taking his two teen children with him whether they like it or not.
  • The Ranger is pursuing the Geckos for killing his partner who was also his foster father. With a college professor’s assistance, the Ranger may have evidence to prove that one Gecko is a serial-ritual killer behind some sick murders along the Texas-Mexico border.

With El Rey being a cable channel, it means they have a very different Standards & Practice than say Comedy Central or AMC. The show uses the F word, it can be a tad gorier than The Walking Dead and occasionally you see bewwwwwbs to borrow the catchphrase from Honest Trailers. Thus, it’s not really wise to let young kids watch this. I think it will give them nightmares too.

The first season wrapped up around what the movie could provide. The second season picks up three months later. I have never watched the direct-to-video sequels so I cannot compare them. I suspect Rodriguez and the writers chose to go another direction. I won’t spoil it though. I will say you’ll be rewarded for completing the first season which I felt had a decent ending if the show wasn’t continued. The second season? It’s plausible on what the core characters decide to do next given the first’s conclusion. I have one more episode to watch with season two. I’m confident it will be more open since I think Dusk was already renewed to have a third go before two aired.

I recommend this show for Horror fans and those who enjoyed the original movie. Given how much zombies have been done to death, vampires have become boring glittery placeholders for whacky Mormon mythology and werewolves being some MTV schlock; I’m grateful Rodriguez brought vampires back to their rightful place, untrustworthy monsters.

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John Carpenter

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Now to catch up on concerts and brushes with greatness which in two cases will be combined!

First off…John Carpenter! Somara and I got to see him perform his music this June at the Moody Theater. It was a retrospective of all the soundtracks John has done for all his films except The Thing. However, he also has two full albums out containing original music which are awesome.

During the performances of his film scores, there were clips from the movies they were a part of. John has quite a list: Escape from New York, Big Trouble in Little China, The Thing, They Live, Prince of Darkness, Assault on Precinct 13, Halloween, The Fog, Christine and In the Mouth of Madness. The best was They Live which had the alien overlords subliminal messages at the beginning while John and the bad put on their special truth-showing sunglasses. His original tunes were played as well. They’re great live and I know I wasn’t bored, going, please, play one of your movie tracks instead.

Before the show, Somara and I got to meet him through our special tickets. Hence how I got my picture taken with him. John autographed me new vinyl edition of Escape from New York, my favorite movie he did. During my brief face time I let him know his movies scared the hell out of me as a kid. He said, alright!

If you can’t see Carpenter in concert, check out his two original albums Lost Themes and Lost Themes II. He also contributes to a track to Jean-Michel Jarre’s electronica comeback compilation.

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More Image comics I enjoy

If you love Science Fiction, I highly recommend Image. There’s more to them than The Walking Dead and creator-owned superheroes…I think they’ve scaled back on the latter. Below are my overdue plugs I promised two years ago.

lowtpbRick Remender (Black Science) returns with my personal favorite called Low. Taking the old scientific terror many of us know; one day the sun will devour the earth (it won’t with 99% certainty now). Remender extrapolates a different distant future in which humanity has retreated to underwater cities due to the surface being too hot; what will really happen according to Astronomers and Astrophysicists.

One such city is Salus. Most of the residents have given up because their air-recycling system is scheduled to fail in approximately six months. Scientist Stel Caine remains optimistic, a rare trait in humanity. She may have lost most of her family to pirates ten years earlier but she remained vigilant, waiting for an ancient space probe to return and report back if it found a new planet capable of supporting human life.

When Stel receives the good news, she negotiates transportation and the release of her son from prison. In exchange, she must accept exile from Salus. The story covers what Stel finds along her treacherous journey underwater and eventually on the surface.

What pulled me in originally was the artwork. Greg Tocchini’s style is intriguing. He captures of the horrors Stel encounters without it be too gory or gross. Doing underwater stuff is also tricky.

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Bitch Planet is best described as The Handmaid’s Tale mixed up with No Escape and touches of The Longest Yard. Instead of women being demoted to third-class citizens over fertility as per the Margaret Atwood novel, they’re just demoted in a weird, global corporate patriarchy. Not sure if there’s any religious overtones like Atwood’s dystopia yet it’s certainly one of the futures the Republicans are striving for.

The story begins with a shipment of Non-Compliant women getting shipped off to the prison planet. They’re labeled Non-Compliant for numerous reasons: being overweight, being too uppity or they’re obstructing an unfaithful husband from marrying his younger trophy wife. Due to one prisoner being a former Olympic athlete, the female warden proposes the prisoners form a megaton team (rugby combined with UFC) and play the guards. I can’t remember why this happened but it’s a dystopia filled with misogynists and Phyllis Schafly types.

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Alex & Ada takes a different turn on relations between the sexes. With this near future, android companions have been perfected but let’s face it, sexbots will be the goal given growing gender imbalances in parts of China, India and Utah.

Alex is a young man who is depress over his fiancee dumping him so his grandmother buys him one of these new-fangled androids. She loves hers, why not share the joy with Alex. At first, he’s rather reluctant to turn it on and when he does, Ada is rather boring. She’s rather subservient with replies such as “whatever you want to do.”

Annoyed by Ada’s lack of free will, Alex starts to investigating ways to give the android self-awareness and the capability to think for herself…both of which are illegal. I guess he chose to ignore the long and tedious agreement, said “agree” without really thinking it through. His efforts succeed. However, a jealous person rats them out to the FBI and our couple have to flee the country.

Alex & Ada is an intriguing idea because it brings up the debate we’ll eventually have regarding AI creations having any rights like animals.

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Two new crossover comics for the Summer of ’16

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It’s always exciting to see favorite characters from different owners/licensees get together! Judge Dredd works on numerous levels despite many people forgetting that it’s mostly a British parody of America’s love of violence: Dirty Harry and other unhinged, plays-by-his-own-rules cop.

IDW teams up with Dark Horse to have Dredd, Anderson and two unknown judges venture into the jungles of what used to be northern Florida. They’re in hot pursuit of a fugitive fleeing justice from Mega-City One. Meanwhile, deep in the forest resides a Dr. Moreau type whose animal-men have recently killed a Predator. The crazy scientist then clones Xenomorph (aka the Alien) eggs via the Predator’s Xenomorph skull trophy to see what will happen. Whenever a Xenomorph is involved, never anything good results, the creature is an amoral force of nature that can never be controlled. Another thing I’m certain of, both extraterrestrial species only piss Dredd off.

The only pending mystery to me will be how the writers will treat Dredd’s previous encounters with either creatures. He has fought each of them separately before. Five bucks says Judge Gilligan gets infected by a face hugger!

batmanandavengers

Here’s a team-up us old farts can get into! Meaning anyone over 40 would appreciate. Sixties TV Batman and the Avengers (or as the comic publisher must use, Steed & Mrs. Peel)! Camp fun alongside tongue-in-cheek humor.

Batman, Robin, Steed and Mrs. Peel are found working together in Gotham City to solve a caper involving Catwoman but matters take a crazy turn when the Avengers’ scariest nemeses show up…the Cybernauts. The what? They’re indestructible robots Mrs. Peel’s awesome savate kicks can’t stop. They’re not like the Borg, probably more of a Cybermen knock off.

My hopes for this would be more Batman A and B-list villains to appear.

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RIP Kenny Baker

The little man inside the R2-D2 “suit” passed away today. I think he also played an Ewok in Return whenever the lovable astromech wasn’t around.

Besides Star Wars, he was one of the dimensional-hopping thieves in Time Bandits and probably some alien in Flash Gordon.

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