Star Wars: Aftermath by Chuck Wendig

aftermath

The Force Friday book release and my vacation reading goal/treat! For two years running, I have finished a whole book while on vacation! Last year was Devil in a Blue Dress and I’m stoked about next year.

Aftermath is the official novel filling in some of the gaps between The Return of the Jedi and The Force Awakens alongside this being Disney’s cynical marketing campaign to take advantage of all the new enthusiasm. It’s amazing what a decade can do to heal over the disappointment caused by George Lucas.

Now let’s cover the book. There’s good news and there’s bad news to Aftermath.

I’ll start with the bad since it wasn’t a complete deal breaker for me.

Luke, Leia, Lando, Artoo and Threepio are not in the book. Han and Chewbacca appear in one chapter. Aftermath‘s main protagonists are new characters created by the author (or other sources, more on this later). I agree on how the Star Wars universe is a big enough sandbox for other heroes, ideas, etc. However, this is my main complaint with Star Trek paperbacks publishing the same crap. I primarily buy these books to see what the main characters from the movies/TV show are up to. I don’t give two shits about someone’s fan fiction starring their loser protagonists while the iconic heroes are relegated to being the fat guys who say, “he went that way.” I’m even more insulted when I’m tricked into purchasing it, shame on me here. Peter David’s Star Trek: New Frontier is about the only exception, he’s talented and got permission to recycle several C-list crewmen.

Now I’m willing to give Wendig the benefit of the doubt. Star Wars is a heavily micromanaged property. He may not have been given much choice and there were always rumors about how annoyed Lucas was with what Zahn did in his well-loved trilogy. Thankfully, Lucas has no more say. Disney may be keeping the fates of the primary gang under wraps to create more excitement come December. I doubt this a bit. I think in Force, the old Rebels will just be around to pass the torch to Abrams’ next generation.

One factor I found super annoying was the language. Wendig used some expressions that aren’t going to age well. Namely contemporary expressions. In ten or more years, should anyone read this (it could happen, some people continue to discover Heir to the Empire), they might scratch their had like I would if Spock said “outta’ sight,” in a Seventies Star Trek paperback.

On to the good news.

Numerous B-list characters are present: Wedge, Ackbar, Madine and Mon Mothma. In addition, a nemesis from Star Wars: Rebels, a New Dawn returns. References to all the past six movies, Clones Wars and Rebels are made. The characters Wendig does introduce are plausible, well-thought out and not three-by-five cards; a common tactic of Tim Burton and George Lucas. The story is often interrupted with chapters updating us on how various worlds are reacting to the news of Palpatine’s demise.

I do enjoy the new gray areas Star Wars is incorporating. The Empire’s remnants aren’t all mustache-twirling villains and a couple even think it may be just wiser to cooperate with the New Republic for the sake of continuity. The New Republic is also struggling on getting newly liberated worlds, most in the Core systems, to accept the transition and trying not to repeat the heavy-handed tactics of the Empire.

When it comes to the Star Wars novels, the only audience they have are the fans because I really doubt casual readers bother. This sets up my recommendation to my fellow fans to be this, give it a try. Even if you’re disappointed, Wendig still did well on the pacing. Plus, it’s not like we have a “choice.” Under the new Disney Star Wars regime, everything published now, especially the Marvel comics, is canon.

Posted in Books, Reviews | Tagged | Leave a comment

Kraftwerk in 3D!

kraftwerk

Picture from Gabe Baldwin

German synthesizer pioneers Kraftwerk came through Austin to perform their incredible 3-D show at UT’s Bass Hall. Three-D? As I joked, I’ve never seen a band in 2-D unless it was on my old, CRT-based TV. Seriously, the effects on the screen behind them created the three-dimensional experience if you wore the free glasses provided by the ushers. I was impressed how well they worked from my seat in the upper balcony. The numbers from their opening song “Numbers” were zooming back and forth pretty “realistically.”

I had a great time overall. As part of my post-leave life, I was enjoying everything by just being in the moment. Not like I ever took many pictures during any concert but with Kraftwerk it’s relatively easy for me. They’re not everyone’s cup of tea since their catalog is predominantly instrumental with songs averaging over five minutes; this alienates 80% of Americans and in my personal experience, 90% of women. I was just glad to finally see this quartet. Contrary to those who would tune them out, Kraftwerk was the forerunner to Depeche Mode and Erasure. (You could name all the German-based pop/rock acts on two hands, including successful Metal ones.) Kraftwerk is also the go-to sound to reinforce Mike Myers’ Dieter character on SNL.

Other cool stuff? They had the visuals for “Spacelab” customized to have the flying saucer land in Austin. Nice touch. Their first encore had robots on the stage in place of them which was fitting for the song “The Robots.”

If you get the chance, check out their more well-known stuff…seems there’s no true greatest hits album issued by them. Well, go by the setlist from Friday evening. Meanwhile, I’m going to see if I can hunt down some remasters. I’m confident Kraftwerk’s longer instrumental pieces will go over well with Somara, she says she can’t study/read with music containing lyrics.

Posted in Concert, Music | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Happy Birthday to Somara…yesterday

Hey hey! Before you declare me a terrible husband, Somara isn’t as fanatical about her birthday as I am. She’s in the Patton Oswalt camp on the majority of them being just “another day.” So I’m saving it up for the weekend for her.

I hit Terra Toys for her, scored her some Playmobil I’ll know she’ll like. Mostly random jazz. Oh, and one of those metal things. They’re like a puzzle or Legos, you punch out the pieces and you build what it says on the label, the Enterprise or White House. TT had one in gold I thought she’d like.

We’ll have a couples dinner later too. Somara also received a last-minute cake request.

I think this year’s card is pretty clever too.

Posted in Birthday, News | Leave a comment

“Happy Birthday” is finally in the public domain

This is a legal outcome that was long, long overdue and the copyright terrorists should be forced to issue refunds since they’ve been raking in $2 million/year for a rather ubiquitous tune.

It mostly took the efforts of a documentary film maker to finally get the ball rolling. The “publisher” wanted $1500 and this was the discounted rate. A judge listened to an expert who knew the song’s history (a pair of spinsters wrote in the 1890s) so the copyright technically ended in 1949 at the latest. Sure the sisters’ younger sibling filed it again in the Thirties but I agree with the judge, at best, it would only cover the arrangement, not the lyrics.

Next up, dragging that pharmaceutical shitbag through the streets by his heels.

Posted in History, Music | Tagged | Leave a comment

Why craps dice have “hard” corners

Over the years, Las Vegas has slowly integrated technological changes/improvements to save money (vouchers instead of dumping quarters, no more plastic cups) or to get people with social anxiety to play (pop-o-matic craps, solo roulette machines). The one element I did ponder was why the dice used at the craps table still had “hard,” pointed, right-angled corners or edges. The pop-o-matic machines don’t, they have the same dice many board games come with today; rounded edged, high-impact, long-lasting dice. Whether anti-D&D people like it or not, D&D and its cousins played a major role in making these improvements. There’s an old D&D joke about the 20-sided die you used to receive with a basic set. With enough use (about a few months), the edges chipped off, it became very inaccurate and it stopped “rolling.” Hence, it was nicknamed the TSR Marble. TSR wasn’t alone. I recall seeing ads from different dice companies showing how their product held up over time, how the polygons were even (D&D dice use the Platonic solids), etc.

Now why would Las Vegas avoid such innovation?

I got a pit boss at Palace Station to answer the question.

  1. Short answer, to prevent cheating.
  2. Most casinos change out all five dice every eight hours, smaller venues every day. So hard or rounded corners don’t matter. Hard are probably cheaper.
  3. They prefer hard corners because it’s easier to detect tampering by the shooter.
  4. Lastly, for the roll to be valid, one die must always hit the wall since the material (this pit boss called it “the alligator wall”) prevents the shooter from controlling the outcome.

The Science behind this seems a little thin but I found it plausible. Besides, the people running the casinos don’t need to cheat, they have probability on their side.

Posted in D & D, Math, Science & Technology | Tagged | Leave a comment

Seasonal joke from SXSW Douchebags

dunejoke

Fall is just about to begin but Starbucks has gotten into the act of affecting the calendar in the last few years via pumpkin-spice flavored beverages. This being America, it also gets some people’s blood “up” because it’s a more interesting argument than the Syrian civil war or which billionaire-puppet will be the GOP nominee. I’m not perfect neither. Trust me, people who cannot pronounce coupon are the equivalent of nails being dragged across a chalkboard. It’s “COO” morons! As in the French word to cut, where it originates! It isn’t “CUE”! Learn to read more than FB and Twitter posts!

Back to pumpkin-flavored stuff.

It’s no skin off my nose. Tastes have changed. I don’t think many people like pumpkin pie anymore or have any taste for it beyond Thanksgiving dinner. Me? I like it all the time and yes, I know, 99 percent of “pumpkin” anything is really a squash which tastes better. Pumpkins and squash are related and belong to the gourd family, no problem.

The arrival of Starbucks’ push is on par with other seasonal delicacies America has developed.

  • King cakes: From January 6 until Mardi Gras.
  • Shamrock shakes: Usually just McDonald’s from late February to St. Patrick’s Day, but when I was a kid Hardee’s did them.
  • Fruitcake and egg nog: Post-Thanksgiving to New Year’s. I’m with Alton Brown in defense of Fruitcake too, there are awesome ones so please can your weak, tired jokes.
  • Candy: Valentine’s Day, Easter and Halloween.
  • Caramel, carmel and candy-coated Apples: Halloween.
  • Outdoor grilling: These seems to be emphasized on Memorial Day, Labor Day and the Fourth of July. In Texas we can do it through winter.
  • Easter Eggs: I’m stumped on any other time you’re compelled to eat hard-boiled eggs in America.
  • Black-eyed peas: I recall some people eating this after New Year’s. No idea what the significance was.

If you can think of more, please disclose them. I’m dying to know. These were just the ones off the top of my mind.

As for you Pumpkin Spice Bitchers. Firstly, I’m neutral. Secondly, no one is making you drink this so find something less Seinfeldian to complain about. I’ll throw you a bone…America’s pointless and sycophantic obsession with the English royal family.

Posted in Austintatious | Tagged , | Leave a comment

The cats of Tahiti Village (Las Vegas)

Wherever humans reside in great numbers, especially at resorts/dorms, feral cats seem to follow. Firstly, the cats discover the vermin (rats, roaches) to live off of; secondly, human garbage often contains uneaten food cats like; lastly, people suck and many just throw their animals away. Over the years, I have watched the feral population around my timeshare evolve and see the staff’s reactions. Most cats live in the garage where the Facilities and Maintenance people care for them. This year I noticed they’ve got a few “trained” to roam about the towers/pool areas. They often congregate near the barbecue pits where people throw them scraps (and people say dogs are smarter). When we had our owners meeting, the rep told us the resort keeps the cat population to six but some guests keep kidnapping them due to how tame and well-behaved they are. I could see this since giving them treats in the morning became part of my daily routine. To help offset their expenses (the caretakers), I donated a bag of dry food and a twelve-pack of wet for when the cats are good.

I hope to see them again next year. Below is a little gallery of them.

Tux, he lives near the food in the garage.

Tux, he lives near the food in the garage.

Jefe, lounging on the outgoing furniture. He likes to go into the offices and sleep on the managers' desks.

Jefe lounging on the outgoing furniture. He likes to go into the  maintenance offices and sleep on the managers’ desks.

Maud'Dib for his blue eyes, he seems to be the boss of the tower cats.

Maud’Dib seems to be the Alpha of the tower cats.

The Reverend for his white patch. He's relaxing on his favorite manhole cover at Tower 2.

The Reverend for his white patch. He’s relaxing on his favorite manhole cover at Tower 2.

Nien Nunb! Look at those jowls! How can you say he doesn't resemble Lando's co-pilot.

Nien Nunb! Look at those jowls! How can you say he doesn’t resemble Lando’s co-pilot.

Cici was the only cat the housekeepers had a name for. He is the sweetest of the bunch. Always looking for treats, hovering outside the doors and he was the only one to speak.

Cici was the only cat the housekeepers had a name for. He is the sweetest of the bunch. Always looking for treats, hovering outside the doors and he was the only one to speak when he saw me.

Posted in Cats | Tagged | Leave a comment

Vacation is over

avatarsatlvsign

It really ended on the plane ride back Wednesday afternoon, always rough because the take off is at a steeper angle with the mountains causing the craft to shake. The seatbelt light went dark an hour in. Rather odd that the flight home was shorter than the to Vegas. You’d think it would be faster to fly towards Las Vegas since the earth is rotating under the plane to shorten the “distance.” I’m not a pilot or Physicist so I should ask one of them why this happens. I think the short answer is the flight route.

Our cats were thrilled to see us. Austin was hotter than LV too. During out last couple days, Vegas had rain and the temperature dropped 10 degrees Fahrenheit which led to me fighting a sinus infection. A nice trip to ARC to for some help there and it forced me to call in sick on Friday; I felt like someone kicked me in the nose by Thursday afternoon. I’m confident the doctors will give the usual litany of “more fluids,” which they’ve blathered for three years. I just want a steroid shot or something to suppress my immune system a tad; the latter is what allergies are, your body overreacting to the everyday crap in our 21st Century atmosphere. I tend to do better in the desert, less pollen yet there’s more pollution.

Highlights of this trip? I only “lost” a hundred buck of my walking-around money which translates into mostly victories at gambling. How? The money was actually spent on tips and things you can only pay cash for, primarily the Pinball Hall of Fame. I went 1-0 at Football (thank you Packers), no other teams intrigued me and the Cowboys are guaranteed to let you down. Sure the ‘boys won in the end, they didn’t come close to beating the spread. Craps 3-2 while the three victories were substantial. My last game ended as a loss which didn’t bother me beyond this one guy at the end of the table being a complete prick. I have also been putting together my own anecdotal record of seeing Black men getting harassed at the tables. They seem to be playing the game by the rules and not trying to hustle the dealers. I go slowly since people are throwing chips all over yelling their bets. I want to make sure everybody is cool before I roll. Our number, 27, lost again. C’est la vie. Oh yeah, Somara remains the ongoing Video Poker and Mini Golf champ. I think I had one or two so-so victories with equally mediocre amounts; and for the Mini Golf, I got trounced at the KISS course via three holes-in-one she had.

We mostly took it easy in the financially and running around groups. Hard to believe we still consumed half a tank of gas on the rental as well. To my fellow Texans, be grateful for the near $2/gallon here. In LV, it’s well over $3 with it as high as $3.40.

Until next year, I’m just going to post a couple side stories. Everybody, including myself stopped giving a crap about the daily matters.

Posted in News | Tagged , | Leave a comment

The Martian by Andy Weir

themartianI think this is the first novel I’ve read with a movie on the horizon in 30 years. The last time I did this was Dune when I was in high school. (Mentally reviewing…so far, yes.) Had I known about the upcoming film starring a couple people from last year’s boring, disappointing Interstellar (Matt Damon, Jessica Chastain) I probably would’ve avoided the book. However, the podcast Inquiring Minds interviewed the author and my scientific curiosity was intrigued. Why? Weir made fantastic efforts to make the story accurate from the astronaut’s background (botany) to the Physics affecting the main spacecraft involved. Getting Sci-Fi legend Ridley Scott to direct was pure luck. Drew Goddard adapting the book into a screenplay will be crapshoot (Good: Daredevil for Netflix, Cabin in the Woods; Boring: Alias, Lost and World War Z).

However, I’m focusing on the novel. The movie will be another kettle of fish, sadly The Guardian already saw it and said it runs out of gas.

The Martian begins after the third manned expedition of Mars is cut short by a violent dust storm. Mission Commander Lewis decided to abandon the landing site at NASA’s insistence which forced the crew to leave their temporary habitat (base) and bust-a-move to an escape rocket. Botanist Watney was hit by a large object so he was presumed killed as the remaining four astronauts returned to the main spacecraft orbiting Mars. Visibility was terrible. Besides, the odds were against Watney surviving such an object hitting him at the ridiculous velocity it did. Turns out everybody was wrong. He was knocked unconscious but whatever punctured his suit also kept it sealed.

After the storm has passed, Watney regains consciousness and makes it back to the landing base. Here he begins the process of trying to assess how long he can hold out because the next NASA mission is about three-to-four years away and a couple thousand kilometers elsewhere. The surprise here is that his long-term problem is starving to death. Water and air? In the near future it seems NASA has solved reclamation issues next to the astronauts dying from radiation. Now you can see why the author chose a botanist over Hollywood’s tradition of Col. Brock McFacepunch (Weir’s words in the interview, not mine).

The novel goes back and forth between Watney’s journal entries telling the audience what he’s doing to survive, what’s going on with the crew of the spaceship and what NASA is attempting once they discover Watney is alive. The latter two are told via the traditional third-person omniscient narrative. Watney’s journal entries are first-person diary things: blunt, rambling. This element grew tiresome for me. The Science was fantastic. How he makes a garden, recycles air/water, etc. By the two-thirds mark, it became similar to reading Holden Caufield on Mars and I couldn’t wait to the story to return to the other astronauts or NASA.

I do hope Andy Weir continues to write. I’m curious about what he plans to do next regardless of blogger Charlie Jane Anders’ drivel on io9.com (dear BBC, a blogger isn’t an author unless they have written an actual book). I just recommend he doesn’t do the first-person crap. Even heavy hitter James Ellroy couldn’t pull it off in White Jazz. Walter Mosley is an exception and John Swartzwelder utilizes it best to comedic effect.

For my fellow Science fan friends. I recommend reading this with the reservation over Watney’s journal. Everybody else, the movie will do just fine.

Posted in Books, Reviews | Tagged | Leave a comment

Gambling always makes the NFL watchable

PackersWin15I’ve probably said this a dozen times, gambling makes football more interesting because you have skin in the game. Las Vegas is the greatest city for enjoying sports too. Small wonder more people come here than the host city to watch the Super Bowl. Well, football doesn’t “work” live either. The field is a mere 120 yards long (109 meters) and 53 yards wide (48 meters) so it has evolved into being a TV sport. Basketball and hockey rewards you for getting nearby seats. Nosebleed stuff isn’t bad at CPC.

This year I stuck with the Packers despite Rodgers failing to beat the spread last time! I swore off the Cowboys when they did nothing but suck against the Chargers…the Chargers, really? I’m on the fence about the Eagles tomorrow, they did pull through last year on the Monday night game. Either way, I’m up $18.20 on football. Thanks for the interception and choking on Fourth and Goal Jay Cutler!

Anyway, I am jealous of Las Vegas for another reason with football. Things kick off at 10 AM! I was able to have brunch (booze and food), watch the Packers pull through (the spread was 6.5), pet a couple cats and have a nap (I did have four drinks) by 1 PM. Now I can get on with some more fun before catching the latest episode of Rick and Morty. Back in Austin, the games start around noon which gives the god barns time to indoctrinate the imported Republicans and clog up the restaurants and roads.

Despite how Big Jesus has infiltrated the NFLPA, football via LV proves it’s really secular pleasure.

Posted in News | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Didn’t think through the band name

badbandname…nor did the people at the Hard Rock Cafe from my guess. If you’re still not up on modern slang, check here why it’s briefly funny.

Posted in Humor, Pictures | Tagged | Leave a comment

22 years for the Silders, deuce deuce!

The latter explanation works on so many levels with the Silders and not all have to do with farts and weapons.

In celebration of their reception, I will see if I can make today a perfect drinking day. Hard to believe I had one with an open bar and twice in a year (1993, the other was that Fourth of July at their local bar).

Let’s see. What else? Beyond my parents, they are the longest lasting marriage I know of in my orbit. That’s something since divorce is common, it has slowed since the surge of them in the Seventies yet I’ve seen it go down in over a third of the couples I know. These two? Well, I’m impressed because they’ve really been married for 29 years given how much they bickered, kvetched and inflicted some with temporary type two diabetes. To be fair to them, we “diabetics” retaliated with cockblocking. I would say it was a tie between Hoser and me. I shared a room with Paul, it mostly couldn’t be helped, I needed somewhere to sleep, preferably what I was going into debt to rent; Hoser via the going to dinner ritual. My point? Oh, often college sweethearts bite the dust as people get older and then comes the time they’ve run out of things to say. Good job Silders!

On to 23!

Posted in Anniversary, News | Tagged | Leave a comment

Happy fourth birthday to Alex

Here’s to him having a magical day and may he be in good health. Alex is getting to the age when he can really enjoy Legos and Playmobil because children this old know they’re not supposed to these things in their mouth…they’re not candy.

Should I have some excess winnings in Vegas, I’ll drop them off into the little CD I set up for him. There wasn’t much to spare during my birthday and I really want to make it larger, the Fed may raise borrowing rates yet will this translate into any on saving? Gotta’ take advantage of compound interest in the next 14 years.

Happy birthday little guy. See you soon?

Posted in Birthday, News | Tagged | Leave a comment

Running is back on track!

Another vacation goal started, I won’t say achieved until I have done it every day but arrival (check) and departure (practically done because there’s no time). I could’ve tried when I returned to work. Nah! One crisis at a time. The goal of last week was to get back into the grind, it will never be a groove.

How did it go? Other than forgetting the damned treadmills here have to be programmed, if not, when press the stop button to get a rest, you have 30 seconds to start up again lest you lose your progress…I did fine. I ran for a total of one mile in intervals of .25; .25; .2; .2; and finished with .1. Tomorrow’s goal will be 1.1 miles with either longer intervals or the ones near the end will be.

Meanwhile, last August tied with my other worst August in 2011…zero! Good thing I was equally lazy during September 2011, only two miles completed. I think I can manage to prevent the worst September on record. The long term goal is to beat my weakest year for a total, 246.7 in 2011. By creeping up a tenth of a mile every day or two, I can stay on track as per the lessons I learned while I was out. Other people in the group had exercise goals too. The instructor told them just practice getting up early first.

So when you feel down about yourself for only doing a mere couple miles or the majority of your workout. Remember you’re pretty far ahead. There are plenty who aren’t doing jack beyond nursing their type two diabetes.

Posted in Health, News | Tagged | Leave a comment

Vacation ’15 (or Vegas XII) has really begun!

vacation notice 2015

Our avatars along with Tiny (Playmobil) Elvis are with us on the vacation which is finally underway.

The flight was under the wire since there was a huge line at the Southwest terminal in Austin…at 5 AM! Bergstrom has made improvements on TSA’s processing, I think they finally learned how Vegas and Orlando do it. I’m glad the Southwest lady was wrong about our luggage arriving late, it was there to pick up after the potty breaks and before the rental car.

So far I think this was most successful arrival! The plane touched down around 6:40 AM local time and we were checked in with all our immediate errands (the grocery store and breakfast at Denny’s) completed by 10 AM! This meant, I had a nice vodka and Mexican Squirt soda with a nap chaser. I love Vegas for its time zone. After the nap, I could still achieve a few things starting mid-afternoon: nice soak at the hot tub, read some of Star Wars: Aftermath, buy some replacement running shoes (there’s an outlet mall across the street) and relax! The last one is the most important. Sure I walk/move quickly and short lists to achieve, but contrary to how it reads, I do unwind, unplug my mind and enjoy why I’m here.

Posted in News | Tagged | Leave a comment