Backyard cats finale

Posted on June 3, 2012 by Steve

There’s been no sign of the kittens nor their mother in over a week. So I’ve concluded the irresponsible neighbors stole them and have since moved out; school let out recently and certain children aren’t around. It’s a pisser. I should stick them for the bill on their vet care but then what’s the point, these people don’t understand the consequences of their irresponsibility with people (often pregnant themselves) let alone animals.

I do miss the little Thundercats, namely Panthra who was always happy to see me.

Our own cats seem to sense something has improved for them. They’re a little less tense and aren’t banging on the backdoor window. We have to treat the cats for fleas anyway. The precautions we took weren’t strong enough or have worn off, I found a couple on Miette. Gotta’ kill it early, it’s a long time until we’ll be seeing cold weather again.

Should Buttercup and her children suddenly return, I’m taking stronger pre-cautions to hold on to them. By now I think they’re old enough to be properly adopted, thus avoiding the fate other feral cats I see on a regular basis.

Posted in Cats | Leave a comment

Summer of 1982 IV: Poltergeist

Posted on June 3, 2012 by Steve

We now hit the half-way point to the Summer of 1982 and this entry the first movie I actually saw in theaters 30 years ago.

Poltergeist is a fairly important movie for several reasons:

  • It got actors JoBeth Williams and Craig T. Nelson noticed. They were cast in this because they weren’t famous, thus they would fit the “unassuming” roles.
  • Even if Tobe Hooper was only around in name only (more on this below), Poltergeist was his first mainstream film. Hooper went on to direct others and TV shows. The Austin-born director still works to this day.
  • In 1982, Horror movies were often Slasher flicks, gore-ridden or not done well. I am probably wrong on this but in my defense I only remember American Werewolf in London and The Howling. Poltergeist was a nice change.
  • I am confident Poltergeist helped fuel the argument toward the creation of the PG-13 rating which appeared in 1984. There’s nothing in it warranting an R, even by 1982 standards, especially when Jaws was “downgraded” in 1979 for HBO.

Alamo Ritz must’ve been reading my mind (I know nobody important reads my site) since the pre-movie show was changed up and consisted of music videos from 1982, plugs for upcoming sitcoms (I forgot Nine to Five had Rita Moreno), the bumper for the ABC Movie of the Week, and sitcom openings: Newhart, Cheers and St. Elsewhere. The comical MC (Zack?) gave the basics while dressed as the iconic little girl, he was chased to the stage by the other host wearing a sheet, the ol’ cheap ghost costume. Other than informing the crowd that tonight’s print was nearly pristine (the reels’ heads and tails were never cut, very rare for a 30-year-old film), the host handed over the main introduction to someone from Ain’t it Cool. Thankfully it wasn’t the infamous and smelly Harry Knowles. The gentleman gave a nice heartfelt talk about it being his earliest memory on TV. What he brought up was the controversy regarding who really directed Poltergeist…after he checked for Tobe Hooper being in the audience, he wasn’t. Controversy? This might be too strong a word. The point is, Spielberg actually was the director but couldn’t receive credit for a couple reasons: his contract to Universal while ET was in production and the DGA ruled against it. I doubt there was a long-term rift between Hooper and Spielberg for the former has directed many other Spielberg-based productions like Taken and Amazing Stories. The AiC guy said he interviewed many people involved with the movie’s creation, namely Zelda Rubenstein (the little psychic), all answered without hesitation about Spielberg’s involvement.

On to the show! To maintain the scary mood we were treated to the trailer for Beyond the Black Rainbow which comes out next week! Then we came back to the appropriate time period via Amitytville II and Halloween III.

How is Poltergeist 30 years later? Very good. Several things came up I never noticed when I was 13. Thanks to the intro, Spielberg’s DNA was more obvious throughout: comic relief namely, the lighting effects he used in Close Encounters and “fire” splashes were from Raiders. The one instance involving the scientist, the mirror and the sink didn’t gross me out like it used to; the appliance on the actor is pretty noticeable. I jumped a couple times despite knowing the plot throughout. If I ever had kids, I would show them this should they demand to see something frightening. Maybe use it as a tool to dispel any possibilities of them believing in ghosts and psychics because they’re both bullshit.

Spielberg certainly gained additional respect points from me after watching Poltergeist. I was already applauding his public apology over digitally removing the guns from ET, they’re back for an upcoming re-release. Now I’m super impressed. Over thirty years ago, he managed to juggle this movie and ET at the same time while barely taking a breath after Raiders which was the Summer of 1981 hit. I still take issue with the Lowest-Common Denominator elements his work often contains but he has too many notches in the my “win” column for me to disdain or say is overrated.

Ratings:

1982 (13-year-old me): A. Unlike other pre-teen/teen boys, I never enjoyed Horror or primarily Slasher flicks. I had many classmates who thought Friday the 13th and its numerous knockoffs were entertaining. I found such stuff sick. Poltergeist was very different. Nobody died, it wasn’t based on some phony-baloney memoir as per the Amityville or Exorcist purporters, the special effects were top notch, there was no Jason and no traditional, hokey Universal monster.

2012: A. When it comes to this genre, I wish there was a device which allowed us to selectively erase parts of our memories so we could enjoy the surprises in these movies again and again. The device already exists though but it only works on a select few, it’s called Fox News. Cheap political shot aside, Poltergeist continues to hold up. I feel it will join the core canon shared with other Horror classics. What’s on said list, I will defer to the two experts I know, I’m stumped after The Exorcist. Maybe they’ll share this with me.

Poltergeist‘s life lessons as per other 1982 features:

  1. (Spoiler Alert) Demand an accurate survey of the land before you build. Check for flood plains, sinkholes, landfills, fault lines, aquifers, abandoned mines and most importantly…graveyards or Indian burial grounds
  2. Counting the time gaps between thunder and lightning really works to pacify scared children if you don’t have a smart phone on hand
  3. Hypocritical Boomers/Yuppies who voted for Reagan continued to smoke weed
Posted in In Theaters, Movies | Tagged , | Leave a comment

DC announced which “major” character will now be gay…

Posted on June 2, 2012 by Steve

…and now let the fanboys, homophobes, reporters stuck working on a slow news day, so on wring their metaphorical hands over this while the rest of us living in the real world, shrug our collective shoulders, then get on with our lives.

The average person probably thought, “Green Lantern? That dude from the rather crappy movie last Summer?” For the uninitiated and three people who may give a damn, no. The Green Lantern (Hal Jordan) DC comics usually showcases is the re-invented version from the Fifties.

Initially I thought it was a cynical and mercenary move on DC’s part. Should this change turn out to be a failure, no real permanent damage would come from this since the Golden Age incarnations have been retconned numerous times, what’s one more? I’m confident DC will just screw up in a couple years with yet another universe-shattering bladda-blah crapfest to entice new readers again. One thing I need with absolute certainty, the Trinity (aka Superman, Wonder Woman and Batman) was off limits and to change any of their sexual orientations would be even more implausible than J J Abrams’ crappy/lazy Star Trek “re-imagining.” I put it on par with Bobby Ewing stepping out of the shower and how Enterprise ended.

When it comes to a character having an attribute contemporary audiences find unsettling, daring, different, controversial, etc. You have to establish it from the beginning or leave a better opening. For example, Battlestar Galactica 2003 changed the genders of major characters: Starbuck, Boomer and Cain. Brilliant. Fine. Perfect. BSG started over and did this. It didn’t pick up after the 1979 run’s last episode and suddenly make these people women. Another case would be Commander Ivanova’s sexuality on Babylon 5. Many parts about her were not clearly defined when the show launched thus her relationship with Talia was credible. It didn’t make me go “eww!” neither. I figured Ivanova was bi-sexual (she loved the Ranger Marcus too), experimenting or Talia’s telepathy nudged the situation as many know what happened later.

Therefore DC may not be changing a true “major” superhero yet they are taking advantage of this opportunity to implement key changes as they revamp the traditional Golden Age incarnations. Alan Scott was the logical choice since his openly gay son Obsidian no longer exists. Why not make it part of Green Lantern’s identity! All the heroes in the new Earth 2 are clean slates so my previous rules (or expectations) are met. I look forward to see what else write James Robinson has in store for the Flash, the Atom, Hawkman, Wild Cat, Black Canary, Starman, Sandman, etc. As you can tell, I added Earth 2 to my sub from Rogue’s Gallery, I’ll get to writing about the title later.

Some may call me an apologist for DC Comics with my rationalization but I have this rebuttal. Northstar’s wedding in Marvel Comics is equally if not weaker than DC’s decision. Firstly, Northstar has never been a major player in Marvel’s Universe. Secondly, I had no idea he was an X-Man, he has traditionally been a member of Alpha Flight, Canada’s answer to the Avengers. Lastly, the general public recognizes the name Green Lantern while Northstar will get a puzzled face.

Posted in Comic Books | Leave a comment

Happy Tenth Birthday Nemo

Posted on June 1, 2012 by Steve

Today is when we decided this would be Nemo’s birthday. We aren’t exactly sure how old he was the day Somara rescued him from the ditch. The emergency vet put Nemo’s initial age around a few weeks, thus we went with the arbitrary date of June 1 since the girls (Molly and Miette are April 1, they too are a mystery…actually, all our cats or have been).

How is the little stinker? Pretty good for someone who is now 55 in human years. Somara weened him off the Prozac last week. The urinating he seems to be the primary culprit with has slowed/stopped. The only noticeable trait I see is his audible whining has returned, the drugs made him too lethargic to gripe.

Despite our differences (he tends to give me the stink eye as the only male rival in the house), Nemo is an adorable cat and like all cats, when he wants to be adorable is the key. I have never regretted the decision to adopt him, pushing our household to the limit (four cats) because I knew getting someone to take in a three-legged cat would be a hard sell. The days when he whizzes on things…that tries my patience yet I can’t resist him, especially after he does the cute little head-tilt bit dogs are known for.

Posted in Cats | Leave a comment

Happy Tenth Birthday Anna

Posted on June 1, 2012 by Steve

A happy day to my Chicago-based niece! I think she gets to celebrate twice, obviously her birthday with a some kind of party/dinner (something) to acknowledge being in the double digits. The other would be school letting out, I think it’s today if what Nelson told me is correct. I’m basing it upon his kids being released as children often equate education with prison.

Now I really gotta’ get cracking on the big care package of comics, t-shirts, etc to Chicago. It has to pull a lot of duties: birthday, anniversary, general unloading.

Posted in News | Leave a comment

Happy belated 108th Birthday Grandpa

Posted on May 31, 2012 by Steve

Living to be 108 is really pushing it but with my maternal grandfather, if there was anyone who could’ve succeeded on this accomplishment, I would’ve gone with him as the smart money. Listening to the advice of his doctor(s) was the key. Alas, he wasn’t big on seeking medical advice like many from his generation; the doctor usually meant bad news and it wasn’t cheap.

So why do I think Grandpa was capable of joining the centenarian club? He loved to eat whole wheat bread, also that icky cereal Grape Nuts, he frequently walked, I never saw him eat out of boredom and the guy devoured magazines like Popular Science. Now he ate beef but this was difficult due to his dentures. Grandpa enjoyed cheap red wine (a hidden jug of something winos loved) or even cheaper beer; one time I brought home a sixer of Miller High Life and when I gave him a bottle, he reacted as if I purchased a crate of Dom Perignon.

I wish Grandpa were around and in control of his faculties. I’m sure he would’ve enjoyed seeing Austin today, getting a tour from me and given me the thumbs up with Somara; he did like my ex-girlfriend Carrie unlike the rest of my family.

Posted in News | Leave a comment

Doing a backfill for the next week and a half

Posted on May 29, 2012 by Steve

The last one didn’t give me any tremendous amount of new gray hair, the support engineering gig if you forget. This time I am covering for a really nice person whose wife had a baby last week and his position is as an account manager. Despite the non-technical elements involved (you still need enough to understand what the engineerings and customers are discussing), it is a job requiring enormous case management skills. The soft skills part is a no brainer too.

I received the approval nod from the higher ups because I’ve worked very hard to be someone these customers enjoy speaking to; I can be relied upon with the other account managers (I keep them in the loop with my interactions); and as Sr. Specialist, I constantly evangelize to the other people the importance of case handling.

Could this lead to anything? I don’t know. I may end up hating this or loving it. Either way, I want to see how these people operate and take back what I learned to my co-workers. Should I really dig the spot, then I may have an advantage if the group expands. My immediate plans remain making the move up to some form of support engineering.

Posted in News | Leave a comment

It’s officially Summer! As it was in 1982

Posted on May 28, 2012 by Steve

School lets out at various points throughout the US: in Central Texas they’re out, in the Midwest, they have almost a week, I recall kids out East used to be stuck until mid-June. Universities are long gone and today is the first day of classes at ACC. Regardless, the vast majority of people agree on Memorial Day Weekend being the de facto launching point for Summer Vacation.

As the Alamo Drafthouse is celebrating 1982 through its selection of 20 movies, I wanted throw in my addendum about how it was also a fantastic Summer for me. It started with the mixed news regarding our inevitable move to Houston, followed by my graduation from St. Agnes (something even then I found comical to celebrate, grade school isn’t much of an accomplishment compared to high school, let alone university). Afterwards the fun and anticipation was underway with it ending in a two-day car ride South.

It all began with Reagan’s budget cuts cascading into the state governments and/or him dumping federal duties on to the cash-strapped states. Dad worked for the Illinois department of mental health as a systems analyst. He accurately predicted what would go down; services would be scaled to nearly nothing resulting in layoffs. I don’t think he gave much thought to part two of Gov. Thompson’s plan, giving all the former mental patients bus tickets to other states…where do you think a good chunk of Milwaukee’s homeless population originated from?

Anyway, as Dad was worrying over our collective fate, he found an ad in the local paper for a recruiter. This led to an interview, a trip to Houston and finally the offer which he accepted. It all went down within April 1982. Our favorite part was when the ‘rents left town. Brian and I got to be semi-on our own for about a week. Semi-? I was 13 plus we had school all day. We didn’t skip. This would mean missing out on the morning pickup game of kickball! Mom’s cool friend Caroline came by in the evening to check up on us too so it wasn’t anything resembling abandonment. My favorite night was when she took us to McDonald’s for late night sundaes while Queen’s “Body Language” played on her car radio! We were both boring kids as well; throwing a party or something stupid wasn’t in our collective DNA.

The news pertaining to the relocation went badly. Mom brought up how we bitched about getting out of Springfield. True, yet those were empty threats, wishful thinking. I know I was devastated. It meant I wouldn’t be attending Griffin with all my friends (who really were douchebags, as I discovered a year later). Looking back, what was upsetting me was the new factor of uncertainty entering my life. Things in Springfield/Griffin looked bleak for the foreseeable future (the Recession namely) but it was better to take the devil you knew than the devil you didn’t from my perspective.

I didn’t let Houston dampen my spirit on graduation night. I enjoyed the evening immensely. The majority celebrated at Chuck E Cheese. Keep in mind, the pizza/arcade restaurant was a different beast 30 years ago and catered to everyone. It was originally an Aladdin’s Castle with food not an exclusive place to ditch a pack of screaming kids on a Saturday afternoon. My graduation gift of binoculars from my grandparents was puzzling and disappointing. I wanted a Commodore Vic-20 computer. Getting to attend Strake Jesuit for a year compensated. I should’ve gone to public school and taken the computer!

With St. Agnes in the metaphorical rearview mirror, Summer got underway…living every day like it were our last in Springfield! Dad split to start his new gig in Houston. Mom, Brian and me would remain until the house was sold. Days were spent playing D&D on the front porch, cleaning up the place for very few realtors, we saw four movies in theaters which was a personal best, trips to Apple Tree Records, listening to the stereo and sleepovers. Mom actually started enjoying going to the arcade thanks to Ms. Pac Man; I remain the family champ at 52,000 circa 1983. I couldn’t wait to see the TRON game too. The news of its arrival was announced on WDBR with a tournament.

Another funny event involved a Playboy. Some classmate, I suspect Jimmy Valentine since his mother bought him the magazine all the time, filled out one of those bill-me later subscription cards with Brian’s name. How I laughed inside when Mom wasted the energy to write PEI a nasty response to the announcement about the magazine’s pending arrival. I’m sure the PEI sub people were like, “Great, another prankster!” Back in the early Eighties, things didn’t move rapidly so four issues hit our mail box. Mom intercepted and returned three. The fourth showed up while she was away at school (I think she was wrapping her master’s degree). We quickly went through it with two other kids from the neighborhood. At our ages, the material was more baffling than prurient. What made the incident humorous was the joint solution to keep Mom from discovering the magazine. We divided up the naughty pictures between the four of us and burned the rest in the backyard. Putting it in a neighbor’s trash can would’ve been easier. I remember that getting the centerfold entitled me to nothing else and there were still staples in this part. This “treasure” remained in my possession for five years, usually hidden somewhere because I honestly never had any use for it. I took it with me to college and unloaded the pages on my roommate Chris who immediately found a purpose for the photo spread.

It wasn’t the only R-rated event yet it was the funniest of the two.

The Summer of 1982 saw my musical tastes and love continue to blossom. It was off to a strong start over the Fall of 1981 courtesy of WDBR, the local freeform FM Rock station. I’m sure they followed a loose format/guideline but the DJs play a wide variety: the Police, Stevie Wonder, Genesis, the Go-Go’s, Human League, Paul McCartney, Rick Springfield, Pat Benatar, Journey, Asia, Scorpions, Queen…if it was Power Pop/Rock, they probably played it. Nothing too daring nor too mainstream. I felt I was ready to finally start collecting albums. I flirted briefly with singles (45s) a couple years earlier then lost interest as other things took up mindspace. I think the backlash at Disco had some influence. This newfound hobby led to me attending my first concert by July…Rick Springfield!

Around the Fourth of July weekend, we kids got to flex some of Dad’s recently acquired prosperity. He came back for an extended stay, gave us each twenty smackers (around $50 today) and dropped us off at the mall to spend the entire Saturday afternoon, by ourselves! This was unprecedented because we were accustomed to being “poor,” compared to what our classmates got to do. I know I took in another viewing of Wrath of Khan. Brian hated Star Trek and went to Megaforce.

My 14th birthday was pretty cool as we spent it at Chuck E. Cheese and seeing TRON at a downtown theater we never went to on a regular basis.

By August, the house’s sale looked improbable; my parents finally sold it in 1990. Mom had to investigate leasing possibilities, a tedious process she turned over to a realtor. Being children, we kept up having a great time with the routines I mentioned earlier. Maybe we thought this could lead to us staying put.

It wasn’t meant to be. Mom and Dad had a tentative arrangement for some prospective tenants by Fall. Besides, Dad wanted us all to be together; something he reconsidered when he had a prospective offer in South Africa. The moving company arrived (Bekins), spent two days packing up our belongings and headed off late on a Friday afternoon. Dad returned during packing-day two to help with the driving.

We had too much remaining crap to fit in the Buick so a second car was rented. Mom and Brian got to travel in this. I was trapped with Dad and our dog the whole way, it sucked since the Buick was from the early Seventies; not a long-range car in my opinion. Dad ran the AC at full blast to keep us awake all night. Good thing too. We saw Mom swerve at least once when she fell asleep at the wheel. The reason why our trek became hazardous was poor planning or optimistic estimates on adrenalin. We left Springfield at 5 PM Saturday, Dad had to be at work on Monday and he made a room reservation in Little Rock. Had we been piled into one vehicle I think we could’ve succeeded easily; I’ve driven from Bloomington-Normal to Memphis by myself twice. Coordinating a mini-convoy sans tag-team driving was a dumb idea. We did make it to Little Rock around 5 AM, took in about several hours of sleep and squeezed into Houston Sunday evening by 11 PM to start a new chapter.

The next few months were filled with stress, complaining, wonder, MTV, commuting and fighting but at least I had the greatest Summer of my short life. Had I known the following five were going suck big time, I would’ve spent more energy appreciating 1982. Still, I don’t regret a thing and will continue to remember the Summer fondly.

Posted in History | Leave a comment

Kings in six for the Cup, no idea with Calder

Posted on May 28, 2012 by Steve

The Stanley Cup kicks off this Wednesday with the Devils having home ice. I hope to catch some of the game(s). Although my loyalties lean toward the Atlantic Division, I say the advantage goes to the LA Kings. They’re younger, they’re faster, they defeated the top three seeds (Canucks, Blues and Coyotes) pretty handily (4-1, 4-0 and 4-1) and they have three former Flyers! The Devils do have experience but they’re old, they’re beat up plus Marty Brodeur just isn’t the same great goalie he used to be. The Kings will bombard him offensively to compensate for the eastern-style of defensive play. The Devils’ Kovalchuk makes little difference.

In the AHL, it’s going to be between the Norfolk Admirals (proxy for the Tampa Bay Lightning) and Toronto Marlies (proxy for the Toronto Maple Leafs). This league is breathing a huge sigh of relief since the travel costs won’t be as bad as the last two years. The other great advantage is having the CBC covering a team Canada gives a crap about. I know zilch about the Admirals. I did see the Marlies defeat us yet we were having an off season.

Posted in Hockey | Leave a comment

Slamacow!

Posted on May 28, 2012 by Steve

Joining my new ’12 collection of retro shirts is this hybrid/mash-up: Adventure Time meets the early NES packaging (circa the mid to late Eighties).

Posted in Funny Ones, Shirts | Leave a comment

If Necessity is the Mother of Invention…

Posted on May 28, 2012 by Steve

…then Kludge is Necessity’s lesser known, embarrassing step-child.

Posted in Pictures | Leave a comment

The Summer of ’12 Look, mainly retro but not ironic

Posted on May 27, 2012 by Steve

There was a bunch of cool stuff on clearance at 80stees.com and with the Summer of ’82 going on, I couldn’t help myself to get some appropriate apparel for attending certain movies, especially after I gave my Spock Blocker shirt away.

First up are the oldies which will be mandatory when we see a couple of the key Sci-Fi flicks. When it comes to Star Trek, funny stuff is always a winner.

With TRON, the shirt manufacturers tend to have pretty limited imaginations, ergo the collage of key characters.

This final one below I was enamored by through all the awesome colors in the design. A person who was obviously born in the late Eighties asked me about its source, the TV show. I had to tell him, Buck Rogers was a product of its time. Translation: not very good, especially when you start to list off the guest stars. Still, it made a fantastic shirt.

Now moving on to the next decade people are starting to mine in order to satisfy our collective need for nostalgia…the Nineties. This should always be remembered for bringing us the TV Animation Renaissance. Samurai Jack receives a small pass because it began in 2001 but was created by key people who put the Cartoon Network on the map.

Many people have mixed feelings over the Eds. The show won me over immediately since the writers tapped into the neighborhood dynamic with children. When I was growing up, there were kids like Kevin, Johnny (being in his own world, not the imaginary friend), Sarah, Naz and Jimmy around my block. Me? I was a cross-between Eddy and Edd minus the former’s greed, need for acceptance and the latter’s OCD. My brother Brian would be a hybrid of Kevin and Eddy.

Now that Seth MacFarlane is considered the King of Animation for Fox Sundays, I hope Time Warner will finally release the rest of this cartoon he helped jump start. Sure he wasn’t around for the latter seasons yet it continued to be the cornerstone of CN until the late Aughts.

Lastly, Samurai Jack. A triumph of style (no black outlines), technique and storytelling. I’m not sure if Boomerang shows this as they do with Johnny Bravo, The Powerpuff Girls and Dexter’s Laboratory. I probably should hunt down the DVDs to get re-acquainted. This show is similar to The Prisoner, you can see most of it out of sequence except for the beginning and vague ending.

Should you want any of them when I retire any in a couple years, to make room for others, let me know. I’ll take good care of them: wash inside out in cold water, air dry exclusively!

Posted in Cool, Funny Ones, Shirts | Leave a comment

Summer of 1982 III: Rocky III

Posted on May 26, 2012 by Steve

The Summer of 1982 keeps on a rollin’ with this third installment about (coincidentally) the third Rocky movie which I watched without irony.

Rocky III is a fairly important movie for several reasons:

  • Despite Rocky II being rather conclusive, R3 proved there was still some gas left in the story tank. Rocky IV and beyond ran on fumes.
  • It was the breakout role for Mr. T. Thanks to this movie, he became an TV star and Eighties fixture.
  • Hulk Hogan received a huge boost in attention too.
  • For me, R3 is the last film Stallone starred in before he started to actually believe or live his own press through stinkburgers such as Cobra, Rambo II and Rocky IV. Sly did redeem himself a little in the Nineties through Cliffhanger, Demolition Man and Cop Land. He continues backslide into crap.
  • R3 has a signature style of training montage which set the standard for other Eighties’ flicks. This is what many contemporary comedies (South Park namely) are ridiculing because it led to numerous imitators.

Alamo Ritz stuck with the same pre-show things they showed at Conan, retrospectives on 1982, Wang/Commodore computer commercials, election outcomes, etc. Oddly the sponsor Collider didn’t appear, maybe the Hitfix instance was the exception not the rule. The two in-person hosts didn’t disappoint. The first guy came out, dressed as a promoter with Weird Al’s parody “The Theme to Rocky XIV” and introduced the evening’s special guest…Mr. Lowercase T!

Picture courtesy of my co-worker Zafer

The trailers were much more dead on before the feature: First Blood, DC Cab (Bill Maher was in this and Joel Schumacher directed!) and Rhinestone. Poltergeist was a reminder for next week.

For the third time in a row, this is a movie I never saw in theaters. Hell, I’ve never actually watched R3 in its entirety. I knew the gist of the story and had seen key scenes. When it was released (around this weekend 30 years ago), I was busier trying to enjoy my final days in Springfield, IL. I don’t even remember it existing until Mr. T’s star began rising. Besides, I was more stoked about Star Trek II and TRON hitting the local multiplex.

How is Rocky III 30 years later? Not bad. The first movie will always remain the best yet for an unnecessary sequel, R3 is fairly satisfying, more than Rocky II; R2 feels like the original with the ending a focus group wanted. Stallone should’ve stopped here since Rocky IV tapped into the jingoism I hated in the Eighties; Rocky V is beyond words in the realm of terrible; and Rocky Balboa fans the flames for the people who chant the litany about Hollywood being out of ideas. R3 succeeds to be a memorable, well-loved story by avoiding the trap other sequels fall into…re-hashing their sources by adding more characters (see every superhero franchise). You see how success and money has changed Rocky and Adrian, another montage! Rocky’s manager/coach Mickey dies at a critical moment. Apollo Creed goes from former rival to best friend/ally while filling the void left by Mickey. Lastly, it takes a really tough, hungry challenger in the form of Clubber Lang for Rocky to regain his edge. What Apollo calls the eye of the tiger, ergo the movie’s catchphrase and inspiration for the Survivor hit accompanying the film. These positive elements push R3 into the good movie camp, overcoming some two-dimensional acting and lazy storytelling. Its subtle homoeroticism made last-night’s audience laugh but in 1982, men’s shorts were shorter (hit around the thigh) and the more apparent homophobia of the era prevented people from taking away the “wrong” context in R3‘s cheesy dialogue. The boxing is comical too. In real matches, very few blows to the head really happen. The last fight I saw was Tyson v. Lewis in ’02. It was lame thanks to Lewis having a few-inch reach advantage on Tyson. This resulted in more hugging and dancing than jabs, swings or hooks. When punches do connect, somebody drops quickly unless he’s a zombie.

Another matter I want to bring up regarding R3 was made by author David Sirota in his opus Back to Our Future. I clearly recall him bringing up the Rocky saga during the book’s chapter covering racism making a stealthy comeback. Sirota pointed out how Rocky is a sympathetic, hard-working White hero getting screwed over by the system; Black boxers are taking away what is rightfully his in R1 and here’s this scary beast in R3. I think Sirota over-analyzed and chose to find racism with both movies. He overlooked some glaring facts. Until recently, Black Americans were the best boxers on Earth. Today, most championships have Spanish surnames on the marquees. Stallone wrote these movies for himself to star in, he just happened to be White. I heard another guy (via NPR) who used to be involved in promoting boxing said today’s potential heavyweight contenders of all ethnicities choose the NFL route for its more lucrative pay. This would explain the rise of lower weight categories getting coverage.  I subscribe to a theory on Pro Boxing once proposed by Eddie Murphy 30 years ago. I can only paraphrase it:

Have you noticed that the best boxers in the world are the disliked, picked on minorities? Long ago the champ was an Irishman, then an Italian, now it’s Black people’s turn. I’m sure somewhere on a reservation there’s an (American) Indian waiting to kick someone’s ass.

Sirota just chose to overlook Stallone’s great luck in casting Clubber Lang. Mr. T oozes charisma, menace and determination. The guy could be Martian and it wouldn’t matter, his acting made the story work. I also enjoy Mr. T on many levels, especially when he’s self-effacing or doing a humorous piece. The Eighties wouldn’t be the same without Mr. T and his catchphrase “I pity the fool!”

Final side note about R3. Twenty-five years ago, I did see the famous statue in Philly. Stallone gave it to the city as a gift and it was installed in front of the Spectrum when the Sixers and Flyers played there. I don’t know if the rumors were true but when I moved there for the Summer I heard Philly’s reaction was oh you shouldn’t have, you shouldn’t have as if Sly gave them an ugly sweater they’ve never worn. My reaction around 1987 was “feh!” I was more interested in getting to my seat to see the Psychedelic Furs and Misson UK. The Spectrum was torn down a few years ago so an overpriced shopping center could be built. What the statue’s fate was is a research project for another day.

Ratings:

1982 (13-year-old me): I. The Incomplete grade feels like a cop out. I know what my opinions were then, I wasn’t big on sports-themed movies. The bigger dilemma is that of the eight movies Alamo chose, Rocky III is the one I didn’t have a strong interest in seeing 30 years ago. Had I seen it while it was relatively fresh, I think I would’ve had positive feelings toward it. Even when I was a jaded teen, Carl Weathers rocked and Mr. T wasn’t an Eighties cliche or living meme machine. The Incomplete is the most accurate grade I could honestly give this.

2012: B+. Again, the emphasis is on how it appeared to be a cynical, lazy sequel yet proved to be a good continuation in the Rocky story. Would I watch it again? Maybe once every few years, preferably if I were doing a Rocky marathon or Stallone retrospective of his good movies.

Rocky III‘s life lessons as per Conan and Mad Max 2:

  1. Sometimes a former rival/nemesis can be your new best friend/ally. I’m talking a really good friend, not the saying the enemy of my enemy is my ally crap Reagan used as foreign policy with Iraq
  2. Don’t forget where you started from and let material possessions become more important, what Mickey called getting civilized
  3. Fear and doubt are the true enemy
Posted in In Theaters, Movies | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

It was 35 years ago, in the Midwest far, far away

Posted on May 25, 2012 by Steve

I wrote about this in greater length five years ago and a tad redundantly with certain words, when I ever finish getting the remaining, old entries posted, I promise to go back and re-edit them all.

Anyway, Star Wars, the mother of Summer Blockbusters and Licensing Behemoths debuted in theaters, a mere 32 but appeared nonetheless. It certainly lived up to its hype which wasn’t as prevalent then. I think the anniversary explains why TeeFury did a rather fun mash up to celebrate.

Posted in Diversions | Leave a comment

Things at work are a little too nerdy

Posted on May 24, 2012 by Steve

Some prankster with the ProApps team posted this near the break room. It’s somewhat an inside joke, namely people who grew up playing the NES in the Eighties.

Posted in Arcade Games, Pictures | Leave a comment